Apology

Dear Mom -

You remember that time you left me at the library . . . oh, wait, you don't remember. Well I'll start again. You remember that time you dropped me off at the library, I was 9ish, to research a project for school and you said you'd pick me up in an hour and then it got all dark and stormy and I was a bit nervous because you hadn't come back to get me yet and then when I started to tear up a bit the librarian asked if I needed to use the phone and when I called home and asked where you were coming to pick me up, you asked why you would pick me up when I was only across the street and I said because I was at the library and you asked how I got there and I said you dropped me off and you said no you hadn't, but came to get me anyway . . . yeah, remember how I give you a hard time about that even to this day?

Well, I am sorry for not letting it go. Let's just say that on Saturday, the house was really quiet and I looked all over the house for two kids and was just starting to panic when I remembered that the two children in question had gone over to the neighbors to play . . . four hours previously. Yeah, so sorry.

Your only daughter.

Subversive

The youngest of my five children, who we will call P for the purposes of this blog, has a few obsessive tendencies. She must put her clothes on in a specific order - panties (and don't call them underwear, you will insult her), pants, shirt, socks - or a melt down will ensue. I'm really not sure if I should just go with it or try to change it, but really she's 3 and the youngest of 5, so yeah I just go with it.

Her chocolate milk must also be made in a certain way. First you pour in the clean milk (that's just milk, but she must distinguish between clean milk and milk that we may have spiked with any medicine she may need at the moment but refuses to take) and then add the powder and stir with a spoon. If she sees you make it another way, she will refuse to drink it. Again, not sure if it's good for her future mental health to let this continue, but yeah, 3, 5, pick your battles.

Except . . . .

When she's not in the kitchen to see how I make her chocolate milk . . . .

I put the powder in first and then the milk . . . . and I laugh a slightly evil laugh.